NatalieGonzalez

I slam doors. Man I’m a bitch about it. But I do. Something about the gravity of a door slamming that really just defines, for me, anger. So...I slam doors. Albeit perhaps not the best response to triggers such as stress or anger nonetheless a very effective one. I mean come on, people know you’re pissed when you slam the door. Think of that shoulder wince you do when it happens. Did you just reenact the face? Same.

So I’ve always felt like slamming doors was this angry thing we do to show outwardly how inwardly upset we are. Then I met someone with a different interpretation and now there’s this hidden meaning in a slammed door for me. Not surprisingly it was my passionate husband who changed that meaning by often saying “Slam the door” when referring to finishing something. Because closing the door is this thing you do that separates what is happening there relative to here. And now it’s a common way we tell our family to finish up. Teenager at the table needs to finish homework…”Slam the door Ori, come on you got this!”

Most recently I feel confused. The entire world is in the upside down. If you’re a human being who currently breathes oxygen I bet you too feel slightly confused with the world’s precipitation. And not uncommon to most things, I bet it’s piling up at times. It began as a pandemic then it slowly began to snowball with all kinds of other things in the world just adding to its size and magnitude. And if you consume media to any degree whether it’s news or not, you’re privy to all the different flavors of feelings. There’s a world full of different people and they all have different opinions and ideas and thoughts. Social media is the best example of the jambalaya of people the world has to offer. Spicy and flagrant. On one hand you have someone in the forefront fighting for freedom and injustice of others, demanding we wear a mask. While you scroll one person away from them to find a conspiracy therorist who questions motives and meanings behind it all. And again I use the word confused. It feels confusing. Which side do you sit on? Wear a mask or not? Black lives VS human lives?

It’s all confusing all the time. It’s like the ocean, a wave comes in and scoops you out you get caught in its current as it drags you deeper and deeper. And the one thing you’re not supposed to do is panic but I mean how could you not? You’re drowning! To feel confused is okay, to feel upset or concerned or bogged down or tired is okay. I’d rather you run the gambit of feelings and have them then to be dead inside like Dexter the serial killer. To not feel. But no matter what side you sit on or what type of mask you wear or who you’re voting for on the ballot this year you should know something that’s always constant and always there for you. Jesus loves you. And that’s very Sunday school teacher of me to say and I’m fine with that. But I just need you to know that. Jesus doesn’t care who you vote for or what type of mask you wear or what side of the aisle you sit on, he loves you. He carried a heavy burden for you and would gladly slam the door on salvation again if it meant you felt loved and seen and blessed.

The world is a crazy place, but it didn’t JUST get this way. It’s been like this. And crazier still...we watch. I saw a sign in someone’s yard and it said “We can still pray.” Ain’t that the truth. So if you’ve read this whole thing and wonder the point it’s simply to let you know that I don’t care who you are, who you support, who you’re voting for or your mask preference: I love you and I see you and I prayed for you. I pray for every person who reads this. Every heart that’s aching in confusion. Wandering around in a world that seems lost. Every soul that feels heavy and burdened by the state of their mind right now. I pray for you. I love you and I’m in your corner like Rocky’s foul mouthed coach cheering you on to keep punching. Keep going. Keep fighting. It’s okay if you’re not okay all the time. It’s okay if you’re fighting a fight you don’t understand all the time. It’s okay,dear one. All is well. I love you, Jesus loves you.

Be Safe. Be Great. Be YOU!

Q1: How are you? Are you happy?

Q2: What do you need to slam the door on in your life?

Q3: How can I pray for you?

Comments (1)
No. 1-1
Jessica Skellett
Jessica Skellett

I am doing well.. today. I am happy. I love the slam the door reference! This article gave me all the feels man.


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